Passionate and companionate love
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In the psychological literature, a distinction is often made between two types of love.[1] Hatfield and Walster define:[1]
- passionate love as "a state of intense longing for union with another. Reciprocated love (union with the other) is associated with fulfillment and ecstasy; unrequited love (separation) is associated with emptiness, anxiety, or despair"[1]
- companionate love as "the affection we feel for those with whom our lives are deeply entwined."[1]
Companionate love is felt less intensely and often follows after passionate love in a relationship.[2][3]
Passionate love is also called romantic love in some literature,[1][4][5][2][6] and is sometimes called being "in love"[4] or compared to infatuation[1] and limerence.[1][3] Companionate love is compared to strong liking or friendship love,[4] or sometimes the attachment referred to by attachment theory.[6]
Both passionate and companionate love contribute to relationship satisfaction.[4]
Characteristics[edit]
In the Passionate Love Scale form, Elaine Hatfield & Susan Sprecher define the components of passionate love as:[1][7]
- Cognitive
- Intrusive thinking; preoccupation with the thoughts of the partner.
- Idealization of the loved one and the relationship.
- Desire for knowledge: to know and be known by the partner.
- Emotional
- Attraction to the other; pleasant feelings for the other when things go well.
- Ambivalence or negative feelings (emptiness, anxiety, despair) when things go awry.
- Longing for reciprocity.
- Desire for "complete union," permanency.
- Physiological (sexual) arousal.
- Behavioral
- Actions aimed at determining the other's feelings.
- Serving and helping the other.
Passionate love is sometimes compared to an addiction.[1][8] Anthropologist Helen Fisher has suggested romantic love is a positive addiction when reciprocated and a negative addiction when unrequited or inappropriate.[8]
Duration[edit]
Passionate love is said to last about 12 to 18 months[8] or 18 months to 3 years,[2] depending on the estimate. However, companionate love is thought to last indefinitely.[4]
A popular hypothesis suggests that passionate love turns into companionate love over time in a relationship,[1][4] but other accounts suggest that while companionate love takes longer to develop it's important at the beginning of a relationship as well.[4][6]
See also[edit]
- Biology of romantic love – Biological and neurochemical basis for thoughts, feelings and behaviors of romantic love
- Eros (concept) – Ancient Greek philosophical concept of sensual or passionate love
- Infatuation – Intense but shallow attraction
- Limerence – Romantic love, the state of being in love, lovesickness or even love madness
- Love addiction – Pathological passion-related behavior involving the feeling of being in love
- Obsessive love – Excessive desire to possess and protect another person
- Romance (love) – Type of love that focuses on feelings
- Storge – Familial love, natural or instinctual affection to one such as a family member
- Unrequited love – Love that is not reciprocated by the receiver
References[edit]
- ^ a b c d e f g h i j Hatfield, Elaine (1988). The Psychology of Love. Yale University Press. pp. 191–217. ISBN 9780300045895. Archived from the original on 2024-05-25. Retrieved 2024-05-16.
- ^ a b c Bode, Adam; Kushnick, Geoff (11 April 2021). "Proximate and Ultimate Perspectives on Romantic Love". Frontiers in Psychology. 12. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2021.573123. PMC 8074860.
- ^ a b Lehr, Nick (10 October 2016). "Limerence: The potent grip of obsessive love" (web). CNN. Archived from the original on 31 May 2023. Retrieved 5 May 2024.
- ^ a b c d e f g Berscheid, Ellen (2010). "Love in the Fourth Dimension". Annual Review of Psychology. 61.
- ^ Fisher, Helen (October 2002). "Defining the Brain Systems of Lust, Romantic Attraction, and Attachment". Archives of Sexual Behavior. 31 (5): 413–419. doi:10.1023/A:1019888024255. PMID 12238608. Archived from the original on 18 February 2024. Retrieved 18 February 2024.
- ^ a b c Bode, Adam (16 October 2023). "Romantic love evolved by co-opting mother-infant bonding". Frontiers in Psychology. 14. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1176067. PMC 10616966.
- ^ Hatfield, E. & Sprecher, S. The passionate love scale. In Fisher, T. D., C. M. Davis, W. L. Yaber, & S. L. Davis (Eds.) Handbook of sexuality-related measures: A compendium (3rd Ed.). (pp. 466-468). Thousand Oaks, CA: Taylor & Francis.
- ^ a b c Fisher, Helen; Xu, Xiaomeng; Aron, Arthur; Brown, Lucy (9 May 2016). "Intense, Passionate, Romantic Love: A Natural Addiction? How the Fields That Investigate Romance and Substance Abuse Can Inform Each Other". Frontiers in Psychology. 7. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2016.00687. PMC 4861725.
